averagefairy:

what even is the 50 shades movie gonna be just like a theatre full of 40 yr old women eating popcorn and gasping and clutching their chests throughout 2 hours of softcore porn???????? please no

g0tyewest:

My friend has a new girlfriend and she’s white and I ask her what I ask all white people to see if they’re decent people and she’s like 

"ooooohh…I don’t really…I don’t relaly listen to rap. But, if I had to say then I guess it would be Eminem, just because I have SOOOO much of his music."

aaaaand shitty white person detected!

me: *wakes up*

me: wheres my phone

me: *rips off blankets*

me: *hears loud thud*

me: there it is